POTUS Bows To Racists!

The thing is that's exactly what has just happened with President Obamas release of his long form birth certificate.  By addressing this fabricated issue he played right into the hands of those racist Americans who can't deal with the fact that the fairly elected President of The United States Of America is black.

Hilarious huh? Roughly half of Republicans hate Obama not so much because he is a Democrat but because of his skin colour so no one with a functioning brain was at all surprised when the GOP started puking up bat shit crazy political opportunists too numerous to list here. But what is really hair raising is that only 38% of Americans polled by USA Today believed that Obama was definitely born in the country! 

It won't stop here of course. The carnival barkers are already promoting the next conspiracy theory regarding the presidents academic chops. It's going to be an ugly race in 2012.

The Flip Camcorder Is Dead!

Yup. Dead. As in not going to be made anymore. Won't be any new models. No development. Dirt nap.

Of course this comes just six months after I purchased my Ultra and started really having some fun with it as mentioned at the end of the previous post. And it will continue to be fun until it breaks or gets stolen as I refuse to be a slave to technology by freaking out and replacing it, I mean when other drivers see that thing mounted to my windshield out of confusion and self preservation they assume it is some sort of law enforcement device and immediately start behaving in a civilized fashion and if you read the previous post then you know where I am coming from with this! I wouldn't give that feeling up for anything! Mind you in the olden days we simply put a boot on the vehicles dash but that was when vinyl records were pre-retro.

It's all the fault of those smart phones apparently. On account of all the wonderful things that they do we are seeing the extinction of everything from alarm clocks, watches, MP3 players and our beloved stand alone camcorders. But I don't buy into that view because I'm old enough to know better. Don't believe me? Remember when "they" were marketing a TV set with the VCR built into the same cabinet? When your VCR went tits up and had to be serviced you lost the teevee as well proving the old adage "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" And I have I think five or six old cell phones kicking around on two continents so I've been a rube long enough! Plus I've already done the lens hack on my Flip which is not possible with a cell phone, smart or otherwise.



And who really wants to risk their expensive smart phone taking risky videos that may see your camcorder damaged/destroyed by drunk celebrities or confiscated by face control or law enforcement in general. Do you know how much personal information is on that phone? Do you really want some chimp taking it away from you and downloading all that? I thought not.

Chasing technology has become a common exercise, a shared experience, but it's a mirage. Leaving the hospital some time ago a fellow elevator traveller felt compelled to ask my opinion on damage done to his furniture by the exterminator (bed bugs, you hate them right?) which necessitated his showing me photos on his popular top end smart phone. The furniture was particle board stuff you wouldn't even find at Ikea but his gap toothed grin was all about the phone in his hand. Why the hell else would you accost a total stranger, admit to having a crib full of bad furniture and insects except to show off your smart phone which no doubt locks you into a three year unbreakable contract which will outlive that fragile piece of technology in your hand and bring nothing but tears the first time you drop it.

Nope. I'm glad I have my Flip Ultra and may even keep my eyes peeled for a fire sale in order to pick up a second one. I'll put that puppy in the vehicles rear window just above my Elect Cthulhu bumper sticker. 

Winnipeg, Worst Drivers in Canada?

Yes, I mean you Winnipeg! I felt safer driving around Rome, or Moscow. They may have a, shall we say, festive attitude towards driving but it's not the naked aggression displayed by the fine citizens of this city. Witness the wreck I drove past heading east on Portage at the intersection of Cavalier at 9:50 this am. The driver "attacked the concrete divider!" knocking down several posts in order to do so and look how far up the meridian he is!

Check out that light beam from the heavens, doesn't bode well for the motor vehicle operator methinks. It could be argued that it's just the reflection on my drivers side window but I know a supernatural event when I see one on account of that there tee-vee show on the tee-vee, that I sometimes watch, at night. And the golden arch is kind of a give away on some level.

That's a busy intersection but quite normal in it's configuration, not like that nasty cluster fuck at the Super Store just down the road. Generally speaking I go on hyper alert when ever I have to navigate a parking lot in this city. The intended traffic pattern as indicated by all those yellow lines on the pavement seems to be interpreted differently by everyone from teenagers stress testing their learners permit to little old ladies, everyone just burning around the lot in random patterns which means there is no warning before you are in a fender bender. BOOM!! Lets not get into 4-way stop signs. They are after all merely a suggestion and right of way is determined solely by vehicle size.

I probably shouldn't be making light of this particular situation because not much had changed when I drove by heading west 25 minutes later. But radio didn't mention any casualties and the channel 2 evening news didn't mention it at all as we're not even considered part of the city way out here in the west end. But I digress.

There isn't a moment where I am not reminded how really shitty and insane Winnipeg drivers are. From the well dressed gentleman in the silver Ford Escape who was reading the sun paper while driving as the firefighter waved us through this intersection,  to all those aggressive lane changers zig zagging all over the place, the knuckle draggers in their huge 4X4's crowding my back bumper and the really really dense bastards pulling U-turns and clogging the left lane for ridiculously long periods of time. Close cousins to the mouth breathers who enter Portage from a side street and calmly sit astride two lanes while they wait for an opening in traffic going the other way. This is a special kind of idiot. Three lanes become one.

So let me introduce you to my little friend! This is my Flip video recorder stuck to my windshield and it's going to be recording every trip I make in this city from now on. When I have enough edited footage I'll post it on my YouTube channel. So to that swollen dwarf in the black Dodge Ram who parked so close to my drivers door I couldn't get in! Next time you'll be recorded. That ignorant kid who almost T-boned me in the Wally Mart parking lot! You're about to transcend your local jerk status and become a famous jerk.

Winnipeg drivers are a pretty noisy bunch I've noticed. Ask them about bicycle lanes, pot holes or traffic circles and watch the vein in their temple start to pulse.  Cameras at intersections, fines for cell phone use while driving...all provoke fits of rage. But you know what? You get no sympathy from me! As far as I'm concerned there should be a cameras at every traffic light, more patrol cars roaming around and a website where you can name and shame transgressors.

Calgary Elects Canada's First Muslim Mayor

I'm really quite surprised by this story and I really don't know what it means outside of the fact that it's a first. I lived in Alberta for 19 years before I left for Russia and the EU and it's safe to say that it can't have changed that much in 7 years! And actually, it doesn't appear to have with few other upsets in this election cycle.

But one thing I'm pretty good at is being totally and completely wrong. Good luck Calgary!

If you don't know the name Naheed Nenshi, take note.

A grassroots campaign driven by volunteers has delivered Canada its first Muslim mayor – Mr. Nenshi, who scored a staggering win in Calgary’s mayor’s race Monday.

He defeated two better-funded candidates, including one backed by Stephen Harper’s campaign team, and saw his support surge in the final few weeks. To say Mr. Nenshi's campaign was austere is understatement – he delivered his speech in a basement that was donated by a supporter at the last second.

The 38-year-old Mr. Nenshi survived a smear campaign and a telephone failure in the crucial final days and hours, before running away with what was to be a close vote. His candidacy was branded the “Purple Revolution,” named for his campaign colour and driven by a broad demographic that included strong youth support. He achieved what many observers thought impossible – a wonkish, even dorky, academic and visible minority elected to the helm of what is often called Canada's most conservative city after a campaign driven by charisma and sheer determination.

His win also proves that the Internet is a key tool in politics and does indeed deliver support – Mr. Nenshi had far more Facebook friends than either of his main competitors, who themselves dismissed that support, saying it wouldn't translate into actual votes.

But Mr. Nenshi had 39 per cent of the vote with 229 of 241 polls reporting, followed closely by alderman Ric McIver with 32 per cent and former CTV anchor Barb Higgins with 26 per cent. 

Dylan Ratigan's epic "Morning Joe" rant

It’s unfortunate that you have to witness Bill O’Reilly’s hate speech on The View before you get to listen to Dylan Ratigan blow a head gasket on Morning Joe but I suppose you can always zip to the 2:30 point! It’s really, really worth it.


So go here.

Breaking News?

I was happily watching the Sarah Palin endorsed soon to be indicted for campaign fraud sexy moaner ex-witch Christine O’Donnell (so crazy that girl!) debate Chris Coons at the University of Delaware on CNN and simultaneously following the live blog on the Wonkette, drink in hand, when Elliot Spitzers disgraced bony face suddenly filled my old skool Sony Trinitron teevee screen and without further ado it was all Chilean miners getting pulled from the earth! And even after the 33rd miner was sent packing to the hospital wearing his $450 Ray-bans it’s still on CNN as of this writing only Anderson Cooper has taken over the shift! I’m told I could have picked up the debate on C-Span but I don’t have that so I have to go to places like the Huffpo just to receive enough bits and pieces to keep me interested. Which I’m not, anymore.

I can’t even be bothered to turn up the volume and check out what these talking heads are babbling about now because it can’t possibly be anything important! Unless it’s the several rescuers still downhole. Talk about milking a story, the rolling text tells me that the 5th rescue worker is now topside and there is still 1 down below.

*sigh* The 24 hour news cycle demands raw meat and so it goes in perpetuity only broken by “Luke” selling Mr. Sushi to his Hong Kong client, or was it Ironman standing up to that washed up actor who looks like formaldehyde smells. Or perhaps it was "Flo" selling insurance for Progressive.

I can’t tell anymore.

Immigrating to Manitoba (Canada)!

I really wanted to post something about my hobby of American politics tonight (such a rich field of crrrrazy!) but lately my world has been all about a very close personal relatives immigration travails, so I decided to write a bit about that. Don’t expect too many helpful posts on this blog as my agenda is all about amusing myself at everyone else's expense, so be advised.

This will be short as overall it’s not really that complicated relatively speaking although the volume of information required varies wildly depending on personal circumstances, as long as one avoids certain side streets and pitfalls it is doable. My relative is Russian by the way but it doesn’t really matter.

Don’t put any credence in what you pull off the internet (haha, and where are you right now!?) It will either be outdated, or outdated. That goes for both advise or docs and it won’t matter if it’s a cic.gc.ca site or a third party. After hours of dealing with a government phone robot you’ll just end up with a bloated paper package in the mail that you will never properly nuance without professional help anyway. 

Regardless of whether you apply from outside the country or inside, call an Immigrant Centre in the Province you wish to immigrate to. For instance if Manitoba is your choice call the “Immigrant Centre” at 100 Adelaide Street Winnipeg, Manitoba R3A 0W2. (phone) 204-943-9969 EXT 250. Ask for an “Settlement Facilitator” and go from there. These professional people are there to help you, for free!

This will be a close personal contact which will stay with you and cut through months of confusion and when you see how much the application process will cost and the possibility of losing your investment should you make a misstep you will appreciate the close personal contact afforded by the Facilitator.

The Facilitator will listen to your story, provide the relevant up to date docs and walk you through the process of filling them out and sending them in to the government. This advise is invaluable but have all your info at hand and don’t try to fake it! 

Be ready to pay some fees up front. As an example an application for Permanent Residence Spouse or Common Law Partner is CAN 1,050 (9 to 18 months to process). The application to Work is Can 150 (6 to 8 months). A criminal check from your country of origin will vary but for Russian Federation it was CAN 120 plus UPS charges (1 month to process). Medical check was CAN 260 (if applying in Canada you’ll have to use a designated Medical Practitioner.) 

And wait. It’s pretty much the same in most countries regardless of what you hear, it takes time.

There’s a lot more to this of course, the Devil is in the details! You need money and support primarily but my intention was to simply provide a bare bones outline of the simplest procedure that I know of, that of an Application for Permanent Residence from Within Canada, Spouse or Common-Law Partner In Canada Class. Don’t expect it to get any easier than this.

So from that, if you have been paying attention, you should be able to figure out that this “relative” is in fact my wife. If you didn’t catch that you’re probably on Team Sarah.